A Visitor to the Future - 28 - The Basics of the Human Language
I was starting to get used to having my expectations be completely and utterly wrong in the Consortium. When Chisom had said that we would be getting lunch I had pictured a school canteen, or the kitchen of the Promise of Sol. No, instead as we turned a corner, there was a large building that would not have looked out of place in the Roman ages. Large vertical stone columns supported a squat triangular roof and cast large shadows across the surface of the entrance behind it. I stared up at the stonework, amazed.
Chisom pointed up at one corner - there was a carving that I had initially missed. It depicted an entire group of children hanging upside-down, hair dangling below them.
"This isn't particularly my favourite theme that we've done so far," she said, "But the children were studying Roman history at the time and one thing led to another. So, for this year we have a Roman-themed dining hall - though the intent was good it's not exactly historically accurate. I think we'll do something less... intimidating next year, all being well."
"That carving is very impressive - was that machine-assisted?" asked Sarkona.
"Yes - but it was designed by one of our aspiring artists." She smiled. "They'll be leaving us in a few months."
We entered into the inner section proper - which had a lofty vaulted ceiling with hanging chandeliers and a large mosaic of a duck which dominated the floor. Benches were the preferred seating in here, and it was a bit busy, if not chaotic. Sarkona and Chisom discussed what food we would like - I wasn't paying much attention, distracted by the beautiful building - a building that would be replaced next year with something else.
A plate of delicious spaghetti alla puttanesca was placed before me, and the scent of olives and garlic snapped me back to reality. It was served with a very light purplish sauce that I didn't recognise - it enhanced the flavour wonderfully. Any questions that I tried to raise during eating were quickly shot down by Chisom - "Eat, or talk - not both! Time for conversation later!" she said. The dish was delicious - so eating it did not last long.
Chisom pushed her plate aside, having finished last. "Again, I'm aware that this dish is not historically accurate for the setting, but it's a favourite among the children."
I chuckled to myself. I wondered if even a Roman historian would complain about the inaccuracy, given how enjoyable the meal had been.
"But, we've gotten ourselves very off topic - haven't we?" said Chisom, "You originally came here with the intention of learning Human. Let's talk about that."
Chisom talked me through how I could go about learning with her. She could fit me in for classes three times a week if I wanted, either remotely through projections or in-person, though she preferred in-person teaching. And then we came to discussing the subject matter at hand.
"Human is one of the most sensible languages ever invented," said Chisom. "It is designed with several key principles in mind. First - it is completely consistent. The structure of sentences, grammar, and words have no special variations. As an example, there's an old saying in English - i before e, except after c, which is true in some cases but not in others. Or as another, better example, you have the word a, which you use in some cases, or an which you use in others. Human is as standardised as possible."
"Exceptions are fun, though," said Sarkona, "It makes speaking English into a bit of a puzzle!"
"Yes, but it's also frustrating for children when you tell them one rule and then have to directly contradict it. Second is noun structure. There are broadly speaking three noun categories in Human - simple nouns, formal nouns, and casual nouns. Simple nouns are absolute categories of objects that are very broad in scope. Examples in English would be tree or water - very simple, very wide categories. Formal nouns are more specific versions of simple nouns, and are formed by a compressed description in combination with simple nouns. As a very basic example, the word spaghetti in Human could be said as stringy milled wheat and water - but because of compression it is only six syllables to say. Understanding compression is the hardest part of learning Human but it soon becomes second nature. A Human example - var-abs-ui-terla - water falling off the termination of land - a waterfall!"
An idea came to mind, "Does that mean there are potentially several names for the same object? Like, if I were to say warm stringy milled wheat and water for spaghetti?"
"Very good!" said Chisom, "Yes, when you are using formal nouns that would also be an accepted name for spaghetti. That is where a lot of artistic expression comes into play - describing something in an odd way is often appealing and helps to express your point. For example, I could call spaghetti complicated hot stringy milled wheat and water which also communicates some of my feelings towards it. But you've neatly brought us onto casual nouns - which are the commonly accepted compressions of each noun. If you look up spaghetti in a Human dictionary you will always see the casual noun version of the word - in that way we ensure consistency."
"Consistency - could you give me an example?"
"Of course. The words for tomato and eggplant in Human are very similar because they are both from the same family of plants and are berries."
"Wouldn't that mean that words are longer in general?"
"Yes," replied Chisom, "The average word length is longer than English, but only slightly. To skip forward a bit, the Human alphabet contains 53 letters. More characters means more possible combinations of concepts in a shorter space. There are also emotives - they have replaced punctuation in terms of expressing emotion in a sentence. Whereas in English the exclamation mark and question mark can be easily misinterpreted, emotives clearly express the mood in each written sentence without ambiguity. As an example, sarcasm can often be missed in written English - the sarcasm emotive in Human makes it very plain to see."
"This all seems very complicated."
"Ah, but isn't English?" said Chisom, "I'll agree with Sarkona, English is fun and it has a certain artistic merit, but compared to Human it really isn't consistent. For instance, gendered pronouns are an oddity in English and make no sense to many of the citizens in the Consortium."
"How does Human handle pronouns?"
"The third person singular pronoun category only has epicene and neutral pronouns - one for objects, one for people," said Chisom, "And unlike English there are separate words for the third-person singular and third-person plural - it has always frustrated me that they is used for both in English. There is no equivalent for she or he."
"What if you need to differentiate between two people easily in conversation? Like, she is doing that, or he is doing this?"
"Just use their names! It's no more complicated than that," explained Chisom.
"The Human way has significant benefits," added Sarkona, "Names are much more personal, so by embracing that as part of language, we recognise that everyone is different. I guess that must seem very different to you."
"And if - hypothetically - I've been referring to people by certain pronouns in my notes in English?" I asked Sarkona.
Sarkona laughed, "I'd be surprised if anyone minded. Don't forget that you can always just ask the Consortium - it can tell you if a person has established any preferences for use in those contexts. Like me - I myself use neutral pronouns in English."
I made a mental note to look up the people I'd talked to later.
"I wrote a paper once on the decision to use epicene pronouns in Human," said Chisom, "I concluded that it was a long time coming, as a result of cultural changes. Pronouns that emphasise gender make about as much sense as pronouns for a certain hair colour, or any other random physical trait. Hah! Imagine pronouns for eye colours! In some ways I also think it was a result of our education system de-emphasising the us and them mentality - people are a lot more reluctant to group others into arbitrary categories these days. Self-defined categories are more important - like names. I could easily talk your head off about the cultural impact that the change has had since, but we'd be here for hours."
"If someone wanted me to use their non-Human pronouns in Human, I would," said Sarkona, nodding towards Chisom, "I know that for non-binary people like me, pronoun recognition was really important in Nat's time period. I guess we recognize our diversity in different ways these days - you can express yourself however you want! But having thought about it, I guess I'd be annoyed if someone used the wrong pronoun for me in English. Weird, I never gave that much thought before. The forced choice really confuses things, doesn't it?"
"The lingual oddities of Nat's time get even weirder," said Chisom, "There were languages with grammatical genders. Fascinating to study, but needlessly complicated in my view. I suppose an argument could be made for tradition, though."
"I see - like French," said Sarkona, "My friend Antonia taught me a few words. I thought it was an odd way to do things."
I clearly still had a lot to learn about the culture that I was now living in.
"Another key point about Human," said Chisom, "Is that it is a curated language. It undergoes updates - sometimes daily - that get pushed out to all citizens. The Human Language Org are always coming up with better casual nouns and they will even change the grammar rules if they think it will make Human better in the long term. So Human is constantly evolving in a consistent, measured way."
"The changelog is a great read," said Sarkona, "Always super fascinating - they even include little word puzzles."